this is a list

I haven't sat down and thought about it lately and I figure since I suck in maintaining or gaining or experiencing anything more then slight flirtation with the occasional sneaky kiss in the middle of the dance floor I have come to the conclusion that I must compile a list of why i would make a good girlfriend because right now i am not sure so bare with me... here we go

 

1 - i have hands and they are in working order with these hands I can hold your hands.. babe... aha I can rub your back when you are sore, I can fold laundry although I do not like doing that often so don't get your hopes up... i can even make you a sandwich with these hands but id be appreciative if you made me one once in awhile

 

2 - i have a very small mouth, which is good for a lot of things like I get a sore jaw when i talk to much so i don't like to do too much of that instead so no need to worry about interuptions while we are watching your favourite movie or while you are playing video games or while watching any game of any sport on tv [unless it is soccer because I get very loud then]

 

3 - i do not like bugs at all so you will never have to worry about me tricking you with a bug by putting one in your food or bed... but i will trick you other ways so that leads me to point 4

 

4 - I am an adventurist as in I like to adventure, weather that be in the mountains snowboarding down south surfing, or even just wandering down town looking at weird shops and buying knicker knacks that our little house doesnt really need but that we buy anyways because they have some mystical healing powers also i would likely drag you into the nearest tattoo shop for a quickie... you know a tattoo quickie get your mind out of the gutter

 

5 - but as for quickies I am a very sexual person i dont know where that comes from but i am no longer afraid to admit it I like sex. I find it to be fun and exciting and even more so when in a relationship [okay actually generally always in relationships because lets be serious you don't want to get naked for just anyone specially on a day after you've eaten too much and you have a food baby only someone who loves you will appreciate your food baby while banging you]

 

6 - i am not a feminist - that does not mean that i do not believe in equal rights and that women are lesser creatures It just means that I like to take care of my man, cook him dinner [i cant really cook but i will try] and you know do other things that make men feel manly.

 

7 - I am a firm believer in monogamy so i wont bang your best friend and parents love me because I will go to church with them and talk to them about the bible and frankly I really only know the bible because I read anything i can get my hands on so weather I go to church or not I can still make them believe their precious baby boy has finally found a good girl..hehe

 

8 - I am confident. you can have boys nights i wont care, you can go out alone i wont care, man you can shower by yourself I don't care I am confident that at the end of the night you will always be coming home to me because i know i am what you want

 

9 - and lastly ive got a great ass... just go with that